
THE READING ROOM
Welcome to the Reading Room. Your private library for everything confidence, power, discipline, and habits. Inside, you’ll find high-level teachings written to provide you with real, lasting change.
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39. How To Stay Composed When Everything Is Falling Apart
Congratulations! You’ve made it to the point of the year where we start freaking out about what we have and haven’t done this year, routines start to slip, energy begins to feel drained, and the certainty that you were about to become a billionaire off the idea you had back in March suddenly doesn’t seem so certain.
Finding composure in moments like this feels damn near impossible, and they aren’t found by pretending everything is fine. They’re found by learning how to sit and accept the chaos without letting your entire being be consumed by it.
In this article, I will share practical ways to stay composed when everything feels like it’s falling apart. You’ll even see me offer the forbidden advice of returning to square one, as well as the exact shift that will allow you to get back up and stand tall in the middle of the sand storm, even when everything else is falling apart.
38. The Formula of Women Who Always Get What They Want
When we look at women who are getting what they want, there are various groups, but two in particular stand out to me.
The women who talk about getting what they want, and the group that actually gets what they want.
Believe me, they’re running in two different lanes, one is wishing, one is winning. One group lives in hesitation, overthinking their choices, hoping something will eventually shift. The other sets their sights on something and goes for it like a leopard that spots an antelope after three days of intermittent fasting that they didn’t volunteer for.
She’s decisive, deliberate and shockingly consistent about her standards.
Truth is, the women who get what they want don’t always rely on luck, reaching unattainable beauty standards, or even privilege as much as you might think. They rely on a formula. A formula they tried a few times, saw the results, and swore by it.
It’s a way of moving through the world that makes it damn near impossible for them not to get what they came for.
In this article, I will break down that formula step by step and offer a set of questions most women ask when it comes to ambition, discipline, and desire. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing everything right but still not seeing results, what you’re about to read will change everything.
37. The Confident Woman’s Guide to Walking Into Any Room Alone
It’s so funny when I think about the times I would be nervous to start a new Yoga class, like to the point I’d rather miss out, so I don’t have to do the ‘new person in town walks into the local bar, then all heads turn’ thing.
And so, whether it’s a networking event, a high-end dinner party, or even a new fitness class, it almost always comes down to the fear of being seen, judged, or even worse, completely ignored.
For many women, this moment is loaded with anxiety because we’re conditioned to crave social validation or fear standing out in the wrong way.
In this article, I’ll break down how to turn the nerve-wrecking feeling into a confidence-building power play. We’ll look at:
The real reasons why walking into a room alone feels so uncomfortable, and how to shift your thinking around it
What confident women do differently in those first 30 seconds
Simple strategies to keep all eyes on you for the right reasons
Questions you should ask yourself before you even step through that door
By the end of this article, you’ll never hesitate at an entrance again.
36. The One Skill That Makes People Instantly Respect You
As much as we sit back and pretend we don’t care what others think, to be respected by our family, friends, partners, colleagues and even strangers is a feeling that makes us feel good.
But there’s one particular skill that makes people instantly respect you, and it has nothing to do with what you look like, the bag you’re carrying, the clothes you wear or who you know.
Instead, it’s how you show up for yourself and if you show up for yourself in the same way you expect others to show up for you. Most people hold others to a higher standard than they hold themselves, and then wonder why they’re not taken seriously.
I know, I know. You should be respected no matter what, but unfortunately, that’s not how society works.
So either you wait another century for the world to wake up, or you play the game, win, then use your newfound power to help change it quickly.
In this article, I’ll walk you through why keeping the promises you make to yourself is the ultimate credibility builder, the consequences of following through versus flaking on yourself, and the mental shift that will change the way you operate in every area of your life.
35. How To Be The Most Confident Woman Room as an Introvert
I always find it so ironic that people think that because you’re an extrovert, you automatically are given the gift of confidence.
But when you get around really confident people, they come off as an introvert. They hate small talk, they value their privacy, they limit their presence online, and they are quite happy in their own company.
And although we’re told confidence is about speaking up, making the first move, being outgoing, the truth is that, if it’s not in your nature to force it, acting this way will just drain you and make you feel like a fraudulent Fiona.
In this article, I’m going to show you how that as an introvert, you don’t need to ‘out-loud’ anybody at an event, or talk about the weather to create a conversation. You can be confident without uttering a single word.
32. The Three Types of Confidence, And The One You’re Missing
It’s been the reason I’ve been so fortunate in many situations. From interning at fashion magazines, styling photoshoots in Paris and Rome, launching a beauty brand and now guiding women around the world into their best versions.
And in the same breath, it’s the reason I’d held back for over three to four years from speaking both on and to the camera to share my thoughts more intimately.
I always found it strange that I could be so confident in one setting, say in a group of friends, where once upon a time I’d be deemed ‘the loud one’, then in the next moment my stomach would turn at the thought of speaking to a bunch of strangers online who didn’t know me at all.
Confidence is often sold to us as a one-size-fits-all, but if you think about it long enough, that can’t be right, surely?
It also can’t be right that some women are just born with it and some are not? You don’t come into the world strutting around the hospital wing, hi-fiving all of the other babies.
Confidence is not one thing, it’s three…
And if you’ve been struggling with self-doubt, insecurities, impostor syndrome, or simply feeling as though you’re never quite enough, then it’s either because you’ve been focused on building the wrong type of confidence or even skipping one entirely.
In this article, I’m going to share the three major types of confidence, how to recognise them, how to build on them and finally how to layer all three to turn you into a full-blown icon.
29. How To Program Yourself For Influence
I went back and forth about whether to use the word influencer in the title because, since the rise of social media platforms, the meaning has totally changed.
At the same time, using it made the most sense.
Because at the root of it ‘influence’ isn’t something you hope people grant you, it’s something you build internally and then embody externally.
Then others believe in it.
Open TikTok and you’ll see it. Everyone’s an influence in some respect.
A girl sharing her skincare routine.
A single mum of two breaking down time management.
A student voicing an opinion that goes viral overnight.
Influence is no longer exclusive to celebrities. It’s a rite of passage in the default currency of the digital age.
Whether you realise it or not, you’re already influencing how people feel, think, and respond through your energy, words, choices, even your silence.
The only difference between women who lead the narrative and women who follow it is how deliberately they’ve programmed their influence.
And as a woman, that matters more than ever. Influence gives you leverage in your career, your income, your relationships, and the way the world reflects back who you are. It’s not about being loud. It’s about being undeniable.
In this article, I’ll break down exactly how to program yourself for influence from an identity standpoint to showing up intentionally, so you no longer just hope to be influential, but also impactful.
Leaving the Reading Room?
Now that you have explored the Reading Room and understood the literacy material, head over to the Viewing Gallery to watch this week’s lesson for deeper understanding.